In the summer of 2008, instead of basking in the glory of being Champions of England again and winning the European Cup for the third time, Manchester United fans were forced to spend 3 months hanging on every word of one man.
The fragile little Orchid that is Cristiano Ronaldo.
Despite the fact that he was only one year into his new 5-year contract, tales of unrest started to emerge from his camp whilst the rest of the squad were still throwing back the champagne. Ronaldo had an agenda, he was at the height of his powers and felt that the time was right to push through a move to âhis belovedâ Real Madrid.
Rather than ask to speak to the manager, Ronaldo decided that it would be easier to keep the fiery Scotsman at arms length and allow the press to have a field day.
It was as if he couldnât bring himself to say the words âI donât want to play for Manchester United any more, let me go,â so instead we were treated on a daily basis to…
âIt is my dream, but dreams do not always come true.”
âYou know what I want, what I would like to happen, letâs see.”
âOnly God knowsâ and the classic âI agree with the statements of the FIFA Presidentâ (who had suggested that United should allow him to move to Madrid & stop treating him like a âmodern-day slaveâ).
A FUCKING âSLAVEâ????
I donât think that anyone kept him in chains and whipped him until he signed a new deal a year earlier. But when the FIFA âKnobâead electâ Sepp Blatter decides that the entire transfer system should be altered to suit your needs (yes, seriously), your ego is bound to explode.
This is where I think the problem lies with Ronaldo – in terms of ego, heâs a fully-erect penis who spends every waking hour stroking himself into a milky lather!
My opinion of Ronaldo âThe Egoâ had already taken a huge dip prior to that rainy night in Moscow, but it was a split-second decision during the penalty shoot-out in Moscow which hammered the final âpreening tit nailâ into the âpreening tit coffinâ.
It wasnât his decision to try and outfox Cech by staggering his run, shit happens, it was the way that he threw himself onto the rain-sodden turf and sobbed like a spoilt child, whilst his team-mates charged upfield to congratulate Edwin Van Der Sar.
In a moment that comes along all too rarely (if ever), rather than celebrate with his mates, his crushing self-awareness clicked-in and a voice said âMAKE IT ABOUT YOUâ. (If you look closely, you can see him decide to do it) I mean why be part of a crowd scene… when you can have your own one man show?
Ronaldo doesnât like to share his stage with anyone; so imagine how he feels having Messi dancing around him like some irritating Golden-Booted Pixie! No matter what Ronnie does, how many goals he scores or how many medals he wins, thereâs always going to be that element of doubt –
âIs Messi better than me?â
In my opinion, the answerâs ânoâ. You canât get a Rizla paper between the two in terms of skill and effectiveness, theyâre different but equally brilliant. Unfortunately, Ronaldo seems to think that the world revolves around him and it makes him so difficult to like.
When stories emerged this week that âHis Dreamâ may have turned sour, with him revealing he was “sad”, Twitter went into overdrive with heartfelt pleas for Ronaldo to âCome homeâ – home? I doubt that he ever considered Manchester home. If his lifelong dream really was to play for Real, then we were merely a stepping-stone.
Donât get me wrong, I wouldnât change anything (other than his desire to wear white) about his stint in the #7 shirt. It was a joy to watch him develop from a show pony into a thoroughbred. He provided moments thatâll go with me to the grave. But people are kidding themselves if they believe that he had anything other than Ronaldoâs best interests at heart. The adoration poured on him by United fans has become freakish. He wanted to leave and gave Sir Alex one last year as if he was a (very good) loanee – doing a job, but ultimately detached from the soul of the club.
So if anybody happens to win ÂŁ100m on Euromillions, donât buy Ronaldo for Manchester United. Itâs over. It was great whilst it lasted but heâs gone, and on top of that, we all know that if the bubble has burst in Madrid and he decides that he wants to be top-dog in England again – heâll be wearing blue!
… and I donât think that some you could take that.